You just can't fix stupid.

I work for a carpet cleaning company. We don't have the highest of quality employees. We try our hardest, and they are all background checked. But we just don't get people with college degrees or those who are hard workers & clean cut, begging to clean carpets. It's a fact of life. And customers just don't understand this. Over my 7 years of working here, I have heard every excuse in the book. Or so I'd thought.



Enter into the picture our newest employee Gregg. Over the past few months of his employment he has had to pick up people at the airport more times than I can count. Wow, your family and friends sure are world travelers. But no big deal, really though, pick a new excuse please. I'm tired of that one. But see last week I over heard him saying he had to pick someone up at the airport at 7pm. Later I asked him to take a 12pm job, he'd be done by 3, home by 4. He tells me he has to pick up someone from the airport at 4 and so he can't do the job. I said really? I heard you tell someone else the flight landed at 7. "Oh, yeah... um... I meant 7 eastern time" Wow, I mean I always tell time in Eastern time, I just didn't know anyone else did. Moron!

He also, one day, was in the middle of a room cleaning and the machine was acting up and not working right. He says to the lead tech (he's still just a "helper") "Well, should we pack it up, this just isn't working" Okay, really? The machine is not working so you're just going to go home for the day. If that's not customer service, I don't know what is!

But his latest one takes the cake for the best excuse ever. He was overheard on a Thursday afternoon, complaining and saying he just didn't feel like coming in tomorrow. Surprise Surprise when Friday morning he calls in at 5am, leaving a message sounding all scratchy and sick. Well then Monday rolls around (his regular day off) and he calls saying that he went to the doctor and has Internal Bleeding, and he's going to need 8 days off. Wow, says my co-worker, that's a lot of time off. But okay. She schedules him 8 days off. He calls 6 hours later wondering what time he works tomorrow. Um... Greg. You said you need 8 days off. Oh, well that was from Friday, when I went to the doctor. Um... Greg. Friday was 3 days ago. OOOHHH... Yeah, that one just back fired on him.

And then he had the nerve to complain about his check.

I quit.